Holy shit. I just ate one McDonalds kid's hamburger, and all of a sudden I started throwing up violently everywhere. There was blood and acid all over the table, but it didn't stop. I kept on puking for 3 hours until I felt like I couldn't take it anymore. Nobody was home until night to help me, so I starting wrecking the house and breaking everything while I was vomitting.

When my parents came home they sent me to the hospital right away. The doctors say they're not sure how a single hamburger from McDonalds could have caused it. After a few days of testing, they found that I have cancer. One of those cancers that is uncurable.

Sorry Newgrounds, but I am going to die. I guess I will never get laid. :(

God dammit Ronald, if I ever catch you, I will kill you and stop you from ruining everyone's lives.